One theme I have consistently noticed throughout reading our course material on Disability is the selectivity and hierarchy of disability by both able bodied and disabled people. I like to compare this to colourism within people of color. This is an issue among the African American community, with my own culture as a Lebanese woman, and in East Asian cultures. People with disabilities experience horizontal discrimination within the community. For example Deaf people don’t want to be associated with Limbless people, Limbless people don’t want to be associated with Schizophrenic people, Schizophrenic people don’t want to be associated with Autistic people, Autistic people don’t want to be associated with Alcoholics, but at the end of the day every one of these disabilities are disabilities. Every single person has to overcome their own challenges and discrimination along with it.
In John Steinbeck’s novella, Of Mice and Men Lennie Small is intellectually disabled while Candy is physically disabled. Both men are disabled but because Candy’s disability is a physical disability and not an intellectual disability he is valued more as a person while Lennie is dehumanized and babied.
Again, in Banner’s short story The Wedding of Tom to Tom both Tom’s are intellectually disabled while Raquel is an Alcoholic, Archie is a drug addict, “Dad” is on Disability for a back injury, and Anita is co-dependent on her drug addict ex-fiance. Yet not one of these other characters, all of whom have disabilities are dehumanized, controlled, and babied the way the two Tom’s are.
I would also like to specifically explore Anita’s horizontal discrimination with the intellectually disabled people in the home, specifically the Tom’s.
Anita’s language is often belittling when discussing people with disabilities. She uses the slur “retarded” so many times throughout the story that I lost count. She clearly does not value her job nor did she actively look for a job involved in Special Education/Disability. In fact, she states “I was gonna keep this job no matter what. I was gonna stop living like trash”(51). This job is literally the bare minimum for her. She compares Tom A at one point to a cat “he looked at me the way… my cat does. Lonesome inside, without the capability to explain” (54). This act of comparing a human being to an animal is dangerously dehumanizing and lacks empathy. Anita also cooks an elaborate breakfast for everyone; however, this act of giving does not come from a selfless place, but
from an egotistical one. I believe Anita is an egomaniac with an inflated sense of self. She clearly sees herself as superior to the people she aids. Even in the marriage of Tom to Tom (which this scene reminded me of two children playing “make believe”) she is even stated, “Let’s let them get married” (66). Her support in the Tom’s marrying did not feel sincere or altruistic to me, but rather a game or a funny way to pass the time. I think her prejudice, and most people’s prejudice whether they are abled or disabled, stems from a place of insecurity and ignorance.
I like that Banner created an intersection of sexuality and disability in this short story. I couldn’t help but think how this story would have been different if it were a heterosexual, disabled couple couple rather than a same sex, disabled couple who was in love. Disabled people in general are desexualized. This is especially true for people with prosthetics, people in wheelchairs, and people with intellectual disabilities. “Joy” in O’Connor’s short story Good Country People is another example of a disabled character who has been desexualized. Joy is in her mid thirties yet had never kissed anyone before, and Joy’s mother also compares her to a child. Yet, people with disabilities are still human. Additionally, not only are Tom A and Tom B gay and disabled, but they have extremely high sex drives. They enjoy sex, they like sex. I think even able bodied people with high sex drives are shamed for this. They’re not just engaging in a “quickie” every now and then, they are consistently trying to find ways to have sex throughout the short story. Tom A and Tom B also clearly know what they are doing. They are in a very sexual position when Anita first walks in on them, they’ve dimmed the lights, they respond pleasurably to each other. Banner’s characters are calculated and the ending of the story is also calculating. As a co-dependent woman, Anita falls back into the arms of a possibly abusive, manipulative, lying man. She becomes the victim of her own doing and justified this choice as a choice of “love.’ Meanwhile the ending of Tom A and Tom B being torn apart because of their very healthy, but disabled love for each other is a stark contrast, and I believe is meant to be ironic. It is Anita’s co-dependence that hurts her and the ableist communities prejudice that hurts Tom A and Tom B. I really appreciate how Banner is challenging the way disabled people are being represented and how a lot of work needs to be done in how we conceptualize, determine, and value disability.
Another interesting part in Banner’s story is the representation of Alcoholism through Raquel. Raquel is described as a “drunk” by Anita. She often smells of liquor and is drunk when she shows up for work. Anita describes Raquel, “A lot of drunk work in group-homes, like it’s their way of paying penance: a vodka binge then they go in and wipe a retard’s ass and think they don’t have to quit drinking” (56).
I think any recovering Alcoholic would laugh and agree enthusiastically with this description of a drinking Alcoholic. Alcoholics will do whatever they can to justify their drinking. They will point fingers, blame, anything except look at themselves as the problem. I also think it is interesting that Raquel goes to AA but she is still drinking profusely. Not always, but often, people who go to AA are there to stop drinking and stay stopped. So, I found this detail to not be representative of *most* AA going alcoholics.
So, I definitely wrote way too much, but I really, really liked this short story. There was so much to unpack in just 15 pages, I can’t wait to talk about it in class!
Word Count: 1,080
I pledge.
